" Ditch's Stout " Master Class .....

[bungle666]

..... my last batch a SNPA clone was ruined by corrosion .....

This Corrosion?

yes!! Good work ditch me old lad!!!


B..

[bungle666]

.

[Ditch]

Well; I've just turned out a couple of funny ones. Made them both in the same session. Used the same plastics as I've been using. Did nothing different.

Last one had definite tones of battery acid. I drunk it, because I had no choice. I can't afford Karpacki by the crate load. It wasn't nice, at all. But, then; Nor was it Sarsons. No way on gods little green earth would I have let anyone else near it though!

And now, I'm amongst the other one. Now, this one is ~ obviously ~ much older than the last one. I'm delighted to say it's far more drinkable. Not what I'd consider " Ditch's Stout " though. I'd hate to let anyone else taste this either. It's not Bad. It's just not what I like to produce.

So; WTF happened??? Dunno. I can tell ye though that there was no Spew. Also, they both took two or three days to even Brain up!

Now, I'm changing nothing. But, my brews are ..... Strikes me the only uncontrollable variable here is the weather. I know that's no excuse. With my walls, the variation in room temperature, right now, should be absolutely negligible. I just don't know what else to suggest

So, I was thinking: I need to go right back to the start. I need to check Everything. The devil's in the detail. I need to find him.

Watch this space. Feel the absolute genius of my thought processes at work ....!

I'm on it .....

[Ditch]

Interesting. How many times have ye seen me telling people Not to go on ebay and buy cheap, chinese FTHs?

Well, here's a perfectly valid ~ and rather scary, frankly ~ independent example of what I'm trying to get through to you people: Look. Note how much of it concerns 'water' contact too

Chink shit is Officially cheap and dangerous! Be F**king Warned!

[Haydnexport]

have you had your water tested ditch ? might be contaminated somehow , try a batch with bottled water !

[Ditch]

HE; I'm on the case ..... However, I think messing with my water, beyond the customary half a crushie, would be a bit futile, round here.

See, whilst ~ I imagine ~ you get your water from some massive concern, covering a vast area and providing to thousands of people. Probably backed by trained scientists and god knows what? My mate, Noel, takes care of ours. Noel's a cattle farmer, in real life. He's no f**king Scientist!

In fact, I expect he's little above my own level, as in what I do with my 'Sanitation Bucket'. I just instinctively throw some more bleach in there, when it occurs to me that it may be an idea. Only, Noel slings in a dustbin full of chlorine. I suspect that's when and why my water turns to practically milk!

Anyway, as said, I'm on the case. I'm developing an interesting little hypothesis about the Spew, these days. I'll have to start testing that, presently.

Haven't had a bad brew since. But, I have had some beauties and some which were simply nothing to write home about.

I just need to keep on doing what I'm doing. Keeping tight records. Then, look for the denominators.

Goes to show, doesn't it: After all these years, hundreds of makes ..... Ye'd think Ditch would have this sh!t screwed down tight.

Question I'm now asking myself is: ' Where has Ditch deviated ....? ' I have a strong hunch

Watch this space .....

[6470zzy]

' Where has Ditch deviated ....? ' I have a strong hunch

Watch this space .....

Any further update ?

[Ditch]

Sorry, Ozzy. Too busy making beer, taking notes, and scratching my head.

I aim to make two more kits up 'tomorrow'. Wednesday 19th. I believe that'll be ten. Then, as I guzzle them, I'll scan over my written records of ten kit makes. See if anything gels.

Already though, I have a hunch. So much so that, when I went to the off license last time, the girl said; " Litre of Jameson, Ditch? " And I found myself saying; " No! The Bells! The Bells! " Oh and we laughed and laughed!

How many Mexicans does it take to ..... Oh. No. I've done that .....

Tell ye what though? Just been in there to draw a pint. Well towards the bottom of the FV. And, in struggling to ensure it didn't syphon air, leaving me to reseat the bucket and restart the suction 'n all sorts; I had a Brilliant idea!


Just no way I'm handling a hammer, nails and a bucket of beer just now though! A man's got to know his limitations ....!

[Ditch]

Cracked it!!!!!

Having sort of f**ked up along the way here, I've been rather dreading having to get amongst batch # 10 so early ~ even by my standards.

I put it in on the afternoon (I do all my gear in the afternoons) of the 24th. Monday then. I'd dropped the temp a couple of degrees too. Put it at 22C. Thus it only brained at midnight Tue / Wed. It still looks a bit foamy now. But; Needs must .....

Suffice to say that, on taking a single sup of it, I exploded into such a loud and continuous littany of " Oh My F**king God! Jeeeezuss!!!! F**king Hell!!! " that the Dogs wondered what the f**k was wrong with me!

It was like shovelling a spoonful of Nescafe granuals into my mouth ~ but nicer!

Gentlemen; Ditch has got his mojo back!

That's where I was going off track there. Pushing the boundaries to the limits ~ as Ditch is prone to do. Testing shit to breaking point. Well, 24C f**king broke it! That's where the quality started failing on me.

And there we have it. The absolute Optimum temperature for a 'Ditch's Stout'. Now firmly and scientifically nailed at 22C.

Not as fast a turn around as at 23/4. But, This shit I want to call neighbours in and give to them, just to see their reactions! I haven't felt like that about my gear for some time now

[Pinto]

Niiiice

[6470zzy]

That's where I was going off track there. Pushing the boundaries to the limits ~ as Ditch is prone to do. Testing shit to breaking point. Well, 24C f**king broke it! That's where the quality started failing on me.

And there we have it. The absolute Optimum temperature for a 'Ditch's Stout'. Now firmly and scientifically nailed at 22C.

I am glad that you are back on track again I am wondering however about your previous brewing temps as it sounds as though you were tasting Fusel Alcohols which I thought kicked in at 27C +.

Cheers

[Ditch]

Pinto; When I saw that face, I almost choked on my f**king dinner!


Ozzy; What kits can go to 27C + before going fusel?!

I honestly never imagined any beer could handle shit like that, without going all out duracell juice on us.

Got amongst my latest bucket on the stroke of midnight, tonight. Aqua heater. 23C+. It's fine. Okay. Not battery acid. That's cool

But, I've noted my records to 1. Test that temp with a thermometer. And, 2. Drop it to 22.

Yep. There we have it. I just, unconciously, took a big glug of this stuff. It was fine. But, it wasn't anything I'd hope to impress a visitor with.

I can buy shit of this quality in a pub or a supermarket. This shit lacks that " O M G !!! " factor. 23+ is just a push too far.


Nail down this temp to scientifically acceptable levels? Then I just need to pin down the Time

[WalesAles]

Hello Ditch,
I`ve never had a problem with this Stout. heater always at 22deg.
Glad you found the problem!
The first page of this thread says `around the 23 mark`, perhaps that should be edited to read `not above the 22deg mark`.
Just saying!

WA

[IPA]

have you had your water tested ditch ? might be contaminated somehow , try a batch with bottled water !

Ditch water

[6470zzy]

Ozzy; What kits can go to 27C + before going fusel?!

I honestly never imagined any beer could handle shit like that, without going all out duracell juice on us.

Got amongst my latest bucket on the stroke of midnight, tonight. Aqua heater. 23C+. It's fine. Okay. Not battery acid. That's cool

But, I've noted my records to 1. Test that temp with a thermometer. And, 2. Drop it to 22.

Yep. There we have it. I just, unconciously, took a big glug of this stuff. It was fine. But, it wasn't anything I'd hope to impress a visitor with.

I can buy shit of this quality in a pub or a supermarket. This shit lacks that " O M G !!! " factor. 23+ is just a push too far.


Nail down this temp to scientifically acceptable levels? Then I just need to pin down the Time

Not so much what kits , but what yeast.
http://www.northernbrewer.com/shop/brew ... ison-yeast
This one is good for 27C and a bit more. I do understand that you are sticking to the Coopers and I am glad that you are nailing down the fermentation temp range

Cheers